A Bum's Life

Was I about to sleep in this pic or did I just wake up? You know I really can't tell. The computer and I have a special bond now (even my pajamas, it seems) that I could not tell when I am not around it. Lucky for my blog... it gets a lot of chance to be updated.

So what is in a bum's life? I never thought I'd come to know. But life is such a good teacher... she does not want me to miss on a lesson... so here goes....

I wake up wondering what day it was . "Is it Monday? Saturday? Well... what does it matter, I'd stay home anyway."

And so the day starts with a prayer of course - thanksgiving for the chance to wake up amidst the "very alive" masters bedroom buzzing with family members agog in preparing to dress up for the day. Then I go downstairs to take a slow sip of my coffee while reading the papers.

After my loooonnnngggg breakfast, I start stretching and heading towards the computer.... "Who remembered me while I lay sleeping... hmmmm..." And so I check my mail and check if I am still a worthwhile person or not.

After my mail has been checked, I stretch a bit more, walk around my room looking for something to fix before I surrender to the shower. If I'm lucky, I could suspend shower some more by tinkering on not so important stuffs but catches my attention and idle hand like a clay, my coloring book, a not so organized cabinet.... etc, etc. etc.

And when the call to get cleaned up becomes urgent because of the escalating heat, I succumb and do my pre shower, shower and post shower routines.

Then I dip my idle hands back to the computer to check who missed me while I was in the shower. Did I increase my value having gone through the routine?

On most days, I'd hang out in our office, answer calls, type, record, make some calls myself and well... different things. Depends on the call of duty. But unfortunately, I find no urge to get into "business" per se. I just make my presence felt so to speak.

At down time, I snatch a book and start reading whatever. Or writing. Blogging. Like now. Thinking.

And when I'm tired doing that there's the television. And yes, ever re reading the newspaper.

SO, what's the lesson I'm bragging about?

I learned that I am such a nervous wreck and I need to be forced down to relax. Now that I learned that, I thought it isn't that bad after all. I grew up thinking lowly of people who bum around... with good reason of course. But I'd even recommend it to anyone to experience this break once in their lives.

Life is not having, i learned - message more strongly weighed on me this time. When you are down to your bare being, you tell yourself... "oh so there you are Check!"

I feel like I was stripped of any need, not even going out. I do go out but only I could force myself out of the house. I am not compelled anymore.

My energy has gone down, I don't know if that is a good or bad thing, but in my case, I think I needed it.

Now, I don't feel like wanting anything, looking for anyone, being somewhere. I am totally convinced I am comfortable in my skin... except of course... well... shucks, you know what I mean!

And when I am back on my knees at the end of the day... I thank God that I am alive. Just that.

Have you ever felt this way?