Visiting Home...

How obscure that is....to visit your home. You don't visit your own home? But so it is for me (and I guess for a lot of other people amidst the reality of migration to other countries not your own) I felt like a welcomed guest in the place I called home for 15 years.

I went back to Manila for a short two week vacation last March 22 and immediately I felt like a visitor, and I don't mean that to be a bad thing. I felt that way because suddenly all the focus was on me, knowing that I'd only be there for a short while made them treat me special. Of course I liked it!

My father gladly took me wherever I want to go. Except for maybe a couple of times, I need not take public transport (which I always took before) because dad just drove me to wherever I need to be. Me, dad and mom frequented the malls together as if I was a tourist in their area. The whole family gathered for a Sunday lunch after we all went to the new Manila Ocean Park. My mom was willing to cook all that I wanted to eat. As I said, I was a special household guest.

So this is how a balik-bayan feels like. Sans the expenses, it was a pleasurable experience for me.

But it is not all fun. I also realized the underlying reasons why balik-bayans were treated that way. In my case for example, it was not simply being missed. My parents did not miss me alone. They missed the family traditions that are now either celebrated with incomplete family members or not at all anymore. The going out every weekend, or watching the cinema every Wednesday. They missed the endless stories at night. They even maybe missed taking notice of my little misdoings. For whatever a parent gives and receives, that was part of what they missed. As for me, they missed the noise I make, the mess I leave behind and the small things that make me me and the small things that make them my parents.

I don't mind being a visitor in our home. I liked it. It breaks away the animosity of being a staple figure in the house and time is spent wisely together because it is limited and rare. I love home....and this visit made me realize that HOME LOVES ME TOO!