In defense of indecision

I'd like to write about me always wanting to have to do too many things, having both of two things i am choosing from and wanting to bake my cake and eat it too. ha ha ha. Talk about "swapang". I like it better in the vernacular. It sounds more evil. NOt that i like to be evil, it just makes me regret it more.

Many times in my life i am faced with a scene that makes me choose. Most of the time i continue to refuse to choose until all is decided on for me by fate. Yeah i know it's like making my life control me instead of having control over my life.

But let me defend this state of mind. It taught me so much to be patient, humble and has revealed to me the marvel of providence.

In my life journey, i realized that the more i let go of my wanting to control things, the more i get things done.

Let me tell you of a recent experience. I was about to leave for a retreat just the week before last. However, it also turned out to be the week before the end of the month. This is crucial time in sales. As a life planner, i need to attend to the policies i need to deliver for the month. But most of all, my mission suggests that i let not a week pass without protecting a family. Both of the activities, protecting families and going on a retreat, are noble. But most of the time, i get to protect a family towards the end of the week, which is the time i'd be in Latag hoping to commune with God.

To make the long story short, i was made to choose if i could drop the retreat. I kept quiet and prayed. Guess what? A week previous to my retreat, i already have two for the week after. But God is not a mediocre God so he helped me protect five more! By the time i left for my retreat, i have done more than what i normally would have achieved in a full week.... but then again, spending time with God IS a full week.

So, stop. Rest in God.

I've always admired the fact that flowers pleases God when they are just there doing nothing. But, like the flowers, our mere presence in His presence is prayer in itself.

Many many occassions in my life has suggested that none of the things i think i possess gets me anywhere. In truth, i am nothing. But God is everything. In the many truths that i seek, the more i know, the more i don't know. Life is exciting!

Should i always remain indecisive? Indecisive is different from indifferent. Do the best you can given your situation so that you could experience discovering where God is leading you. Be patient.