During this past month, even if I have already made my decision, I often wondered if it was right to leave the company. But God did not make me wait for long. He showed me two signs that He was indeed in control of the game.
1. Thirdy, invited me to his birthday celebration at Red Box today and it made me realize that I did not loose the friendship anyway. The fun continues. We just don't get to see each other as often. And tommorow, a client - and now a friend- invited me for a birthday blow out naman.
2. After the partying, we went to Joseph who was in Medical city for hypertension. And he too reminded me all too well that, although work was fun, sometimes the body revolts.
But I wouldn't like to only remind myself of the reasons why I decided to leave. I also wanted to be reminded of the small glimpses of victory that abound in the journey.
My very first achievement in Pramerica came not long after I joined.
I knew this was immaterial to my success but it felt good at that time knowing that I passed the first hurdle with flying colors.And then, not long after was the confirmation of my worst fears: I did't make the cut for the TAP program after only 3 months. But I did not stop trying. I felt stupid at that time. Seemingly I was making something not bound to work, work. But my effort was not in vain. Soon, after seven months of LPship I finally got the coveted 3w flag. My first and last.
But it was all I needed. I was back in the ball game.Despite this though, it was still a surprise for me to have lasted three years in the company where it was an achievement to last for even a year.
But I thought, as long as they believe I can do this, I'll move on.And believe they did....
And I in turn believed the noble mission we have....
But all must come to an end. Admittedly, I am still in a remission stage... as if that is not obvious. However, I am not meant to understand all the coming and goings in my life. I am only meant to live it. : )
2 comments:
Closing Cycles
By Paulo Coelho
One always has to know when a stage comes to an
end. If we insist on staying longer than the
necessary time, we lose the happiness and the
meaning of the other stages we have to go through.
Closing cycles, shutting doors, ending chapters -
whatever name we give it, what matters is to leave
in the past the moments of life that have finished.
Did you lose your job? Has a loving relationship
come to an end? Did you leave your parents' house?
Gone to live abroad? Has a long-lasting friendship
ended all of a sudden? You can spend a long time
wondering why this has happened. You can tell
yourself you won't take another step until you find
out why certain things that were so important and so
solid in your life have turned into dust, just like
that. But such an attitude will be awfully stressing
for everyone involved: your parents, your husband or
wife, your friends, your children, your sister,
everyone will be finishing chapters, turning over
new leaves, getting on with life, and they will all
feel bad seeing you at a standstill.
None of us can be in the present and the past at
the same time, not even when we try to understand
the things that happen to us. What has passed will
not return: we cannot forever be children, late
adolescents, sons that feel guilt or rancor towards
our parents, lovers who day and night relive an
affair with someone who has gone away and has not
the least intention of coming back. Things pass, and
the best we can do is to let them really go away.
That is why it is so important (however painful it
may be!) to destroy souvenirs, move, give lots of
things away to orphanages, sell or donate the books
you have at home. Everything in this visible world
is a manifestation of the invisible world, of what
is going on in our hearts - and getting rid of
certain memories also means making some room for
other memories to take their place. Let things go.
Release them. Detach yourself from them. Nobody
plays this life with marked cards, so sometimes we
win and sometimes we lose. Do not expect anything in
return, do not expect your efforts to be
appreciated, your genius to be discovered, your love
to be understood. Stop turning on your emotional
television to watch the same program over and over
again, the one that shows how much you suffered from
a certain loss: that is only poisoning you, nothing
else.
Nothing is more dangerous than not accepting love
relationships that are broken off, work that is
promised but there is no starting date, decisions
that are always put off waiting for the "ideal
moment." Before a new chapter is begun, the old one
has to be finished: tell yourself that what has
passed will never come back. Remember that there was
a time when you could live without that thing or
that person - nothing is irreplaceable, a habit is
not a need. This may sound so obvious, it may even
be difficult, but it is very important.
Closing cycles. Not because of pride, incapacity
or arrogance, but simply because that no longer fits
your life. Shut the door, change the record, clean
the house, shake off the dust. Stop being who you
were, and change into who you are.
Ruby! thanks thanks. The article was so so appropriate. I am moving on... thanks... even my room is doing exactly what coelho was saying...: ) it's funny that the last paragraph of the article coincided with the title I was suppose to give this post. I was suppose to put "The life that was" as title. You really couldnt find a more appropriate article. Thanks friend!
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